For me its fun, I am a Mystery Science Theater 3000 fan so it comes with the territory 
And Dude wheres my car is on my list of faves by the way.
Here is my first review:
I will be judging these films a little differently then you expect, this is my patented (well not so patented) Plan 9 scale.
The scale goes from 1 being the worst B movie in history to 9 being on par or better then Plan 9
There are cheese pieces to add up to the final score, 1 cheese piece for 1 point, nine cheese pieces equal perfect cheese film!
I will start with the infamous Plan 9 from outer space where the name of this scale originally came from
Plan 9:
Well where to start, often considered the worst of the worst Plan 9 is indeed worthy of its reputation.
I guess we start with its director, Edward D Wood Jr, born 10 October 1924, died 10 December 1978.
Born in Poughkeepsie NY Ed Wood always seemed to have stars in his eyes.
He was a big fan of stars such as Béla Lugosi, better known as the classic black and white Dracula (1931)
The two strangely seemed pre destined to meet, Ed Wood was a director in search of his “Citizen Kane” as he often tried to emulate Orson Welles (of the infamous War of The worlds 1938 radio broadcast)
Anyhow Ed Wood was quite unique for his time, a known cross dresser he was often a supporter of those who were like him.
He was not gay by any means, he clearly liked females and often had moderately strong women in his films for that time.
Anyhow he had had well… a awful career as it was before plan 9, with flops like Glen or Glenda and Bride of the monster (both were two of the last films Lugosi made) he already had a reputation of making bad films.
But Plan 9 was his crowning achievement, the film that would make him known as the worst director of all time.
For Plan 9 it seemed that even minute 1 of the film was never going to pass, his original plan was to bring Lugosi in for one more time.
But sadly it was not meant to be, Lugosi died before Ed even began his initial phases for the film.
One disaster after another hit Wood in a tidal wave of crap.
First he had to come up with a new center star for his new film, one of those he targeted was Maila Nurmi AKA Vampira who depending on who you listen to wanted too much money for a speaking role, or refused to speak and went on in the role as a mute on purpose.
His second option was to utilize Sweedish Pro Wrestler Tor Johnson for the speaking role, Tor had already had a long standing career in hollywood as a B list actor starring in films such as The Beast of Yucca Flats and Ed Wood’s own Bride of the Monster.
But Tor was not that good with English, his speaking lines were dreadful in the movie and clearly shown that he was not the American born detective he was supposed to play in plan 9.
The rest of the actors were all second raters such as Duke Moore who had the most roles in a Ed Wood film
And TV psychic Criswell
All were put into the melting pot, but obviously the end result was nothing less then astoundingly convoluted.
There are countless mistakes in the film, bad sets, visible boom mikes, bad acting, countless stock footage, car hop suited aliens, hubcap UFO’s…
The list is endless on how many mistakes Wood made.
But perhaps his biggest goof is to cover up Lugosi died before the film was made, Wood had some shots of Lugosi dressed in his Dracula garb doing a lot of weird nonsense but it was not enough.
He had to have a stand in, Plan 9’s main plot was these aliens in these car hop outfits were using bodies of the recent dead to do their deeds, Lugosi’s character was brought in for this reason.
But after Lugosi’s death Wood had no clue where to go, luckily his wifes chiropractor had a very similar head to Lugosi (above the nose and jaw line)
To stand in for Lugosi he had this chiropractor dress up in this Dracula cape but the ENTIRE time he had to cover his face.
Only his forehead and upper ears were ever shown.
But outside the incredibly long laundry list of errors there is actually a positive message to the film, that weapons development could get so out of control that we could bring an end to not only us but the entire universe, Ed Wood saw first hand the horrors of war when he fought in world war II.
He became a supporter of peace, he had wished that plan 9 would serve as a warning to those who made the bombs.
But Ed’s dreams were always bigger then his reality, his vision too bold and his ambition uncontrolled.
Wood wanted to make films that spoke to people, but he seemed he could not speak English himself.
Looking at this film the first time you can see all the mistakes you want but upon further viewing you can see some of the message he wanted to give.
In total its very easy to target this film as a bad movie, but trust me there is far far worse.
So looking back lets take in the score:
Acting: 2 Pieces of cheese
Effects: 1 Piece of cheese
Directing: 1 Piece of cheese
Production: 1 Piece of cheese
Cast: 2 Pieces of cheese
Concept: 2 Pieces of Cheese
Overall:
Perfect plan 9 score! (no surprise)
Best line of the movie:
Eros: Can you see or measure an atom? Yet you can explode one. A ray of sunlight is made up of many atoms!
Jeff Trent: So what if we do develop this Solanite bomb? We’d be even a stronger nation than now.
Eros: [with disgust] Stronger. You see? You see? Your stupid minds! Stupid! Stupid!
Worst lines:
Every word uttered from Tor Johnson’s mouth
